Luke 23:33-49 Luke 24:1-12 A woman looked out the window of her home and washorrified to see her German Shepherd shaking the lifeout of the neighbor’s pet rabbit. Her family had beenquarreling with these neighbors; this was certainlygoing to make matters worse. She grabbed a broom and ran outside, pummeling thepooch until he dropped the…

Matthew 21:1-9 A kindergarten teacher gave her class a “show and tell”assignment of bringing something to represent theirreligion. The first child got in front of the class and said, “Myname is Benjamin and I am Jewish and this is the Star ofDavid.” The second child got in front of her class and said, “Myname is…

Hebrews 12:1-3 A Man and his Wife are Expecting a Baby.He finally gets the call while at work and startsdriving to the hospital. As he gets closer, he getsmore and more anxious, thinking about the baby,his wife, whether it’s a boy or a girl, etc. But ashe’s driving he hits a curb. The car’s springs…

Joshua 2 The airline had a policy that required the firstofficer to stand at the door while the passengersexited, smile, and give them a – ‘Thanks for flyingXYZ airline’. An airline pilot on this particular flight hammeredhis plane into the runway really hard. In light of hisbad landing, he had difficulty looking the passengersin the…

Exodus 12:21-30 I had visited a cafe one day with my friends. Thewaiter recommended that we try their specialcoffee. We agreed and soon the coffee arrived. Aswe drank the coffee, we realized that it tastes likedirt and mud. Disgusted by the fact, all of uscomplained immediately. The alarmed waiterrushes over and says, “Well Sir, it…

Exodus 2:11-15 What do you write in a slug’s Valentine’s Daycard?” “Be my Valen-slime!”“What did the paper clip say to the magnet?” “Ifind you very attractive.”“What did the stamp say to the envelope onValentine’s Day?” “I’m stuck on you!”“Why didn’t the skeleton want to send anyValentine’s Day cards?” “His heart wasn’t in it.”“Why did the…

Exodus 1:15-22, 2:1-10 An exercise for people who are out of shape: Begin with afive-pound potato bag in each hand. Extend your armsstraight out from your sides, hold them there for a fullminute, and then relax. After a few weeks, move up to ten-pound potato bags. Then try 50-pound potato bags, andeventually try to get…

Genesis 28,32,42 Janie’s husband had been slipping in and out of acoma for several months. Things looked grim, butshe was by his bedside every single day. One dayas he slipped back into consciousness, he motionedfor her to come close to him. She pulled the chairclose to the bed and leaned her ear close to be…

Genesis 27:27-29, 39-46 Three nurses die and go up to heaven. Peter says,So, tell me, what did you do with your life?First nurse said, I worked in an emergency room,and it was really challenging. But we were able tohelp some people.Peter says, that’s fabulous. Come on in. Peter says to the second nurse, what did…

Genesis 22:1-14 Two little boys were known troublemakers, stealing everything they could get their hands, even from the church.One day a priest stopped one of the boys and asked, “Where is God?” The boy shrugged and the priest repeated, “Where is God?” The boy ran out of the cathedral crying to his home where he…